Keeping the skills fresh/CT State Police

It's almost November, near the end of the semester, and life seems to be moving pretty quick. In the next month, I have to complete an in-depth article on something related to Cheshire, obtain some detailed election information from the town and try to find some paying media gigs (other than the lighting business). All this while trying to elude the local 5-0.

Cheshire has been a pain this week: for starters, my potential article on a Cheshire cafe fell through because the business owner I tried to interview flaked out at the last minute. Then, my efforts to obtain detailed voting records (see: PUBLIC INFORMATION) were derailed by an angry town official. Her words: "I'm not going to accommodate any personal requests."

This is a bold statement, considering she is a servant of the public and is obliged to give me that information. I know she probably has a right to be ornery because Election Day is coming up soon, but this woman was everything a public servant shouldn't be.

Shucks. Call me old-fashioned.

ATTENTION ALL DRIVERS ON CT ROUTE 8 NEAR TORRINGTON. There are cops on the prowl for excessive speeding, and they apparently have something to prove.

I was approaching the city at a pace slightly over 80 miles per hour when I saw a car on the shoulder with its lights off. As I expected, it was a Connecticut State Police Officer, and he closed in on me pretty fast.

He clearly wasn't happy to see me when he approached my car. He must have been in his mid-twenties, around my age, and he must have thought he pulled over Pablo Escobar because of the questions he had for me.

After spending a few minutes drilling me with questions such as, "Do you have any alcohol in the car," and "do you have any guns," and "do you have any marijuana," and "do you have any knives?" He asked twice if I had knives, and I couldn't tell you why he did.

(For anyone who knows me, I am a timid, law-abiding white guy. I am a cat person and I enjoy a cup of green tea when I relax. I couldn't pose a threat to schoolchildren, even if I HAD weapons in my possession)

So he wrote me up for going 80, though he said he clocked me at 82: he said he wanted to save me a few dollars. Gee, thank you officer. A $254 ticket is so much better than anything else you could have thrown at me.

So in the end, I got verbally assaulted by some punk cop who handed me an excessive financial penalty for driving fast on an empty stretch of highway, a minor infraction at best and hardly failing of any moral code.

Let me show my gratitude to the Connecticut State Police: thank you for keeping reckless criminals like me in check, and ask me for suggestions as to where you should shove any future infractions.